A.B. Credaro, delivering an impromptu lecture during a short session between morning tea and resumption of duties, stated that the " ... whole concept of 'customer focus' is a crock. Management, right across all industries, has been trotting out that old chestnut for years - as a means of paying less attention to their staff, and spending less money on their essential needs". The lack of an espresso coffee machine in the lunch room was once again mentioned.

Credaro continued, stating that if management looked after their employees with more diligence, then it would automatically follow that any staff would be in a much better mood - and therefore be nicer to their clientele.

Unfortunately, no one was listening. For some reason everyone went back to their desks early, before this latest tirade had finished ...

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Despite being offered euphemisms such as 'a slight tendency to heft' and 'well rounded', an unnamed minimally abdominally enhanced librarian (not pictured here) insisted that those who had met him in the flesh (as it were) would whole-heartedly agree with him with regard to his own description.

The exchange occurred during online discussion on the relative merits and otherwise of a system-wide change in library computer networking. Although many sites using the new thin client technology were philosophical about the nature of the pilot scheme, others were unhappy about the lack of training given on the use of accompanying software ...

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CHILDREN'S LITERATURE

Outrage aired in media, schools

WLW was swamped with requests to reference the story covered by just about every major daily paper, library discussion list, and talk-back radio station on the planet. (OK, not actually swamped, but there were three requests, which is pretty major for us).

Children's author and Newbury Medal winner Susan Paton, rumored to also be a librarian, won't be gluing in date due slips for a while, judging by the publicity generated by the use of a word referring to "men’s genitalia"(as delicately expressed by one elementary school librarian) in her book, The higher power of lucky.

Except that the actual reference refers to the body part of a dog, although that may not be pertinent to the discussion. But for cryin' out loud, we figure readers should have all the facts, the actual context, and even a possibly slightly biased opinion chucked in for good measure.

At the time of writing, there is no indication if the offending word, and others of similar ilk, will be deleted from dictionaries and medical references ...

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PROFESSIONAL SERVICE AWARD

Biblia honored by peer

In recognition of maintaining the free database of casual and relief school library staff for a period now exceeding seven years, a Queensland substitute teacher librarian wrote a really nice email thanking the Warrior Librarian.

Although there was no actual merit certificate issued with the email (the pictured testamur is an artist's rendition of a concept - and not a very good artist, so we don't need that pointed out to us), it was noted that the email should be considered as "an award of appreciation and recognition for the maintenance of the database for so very long [people cull things younger than this - but never at school I have worked!]" ...

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RESEARCH

Suiting library instruction to personality types

Library folk should not be deterred by a publication date of 2003; Jeannie Williamson's paper is still worth a read, for those that have the time, energy and bandwidth.

Unfortunately, the paper doesn't quite cover all the possibilities. Patrons who fall into the Plain Nutso catagory are overlooked, as are The Demented, Psychopaths, the Generally Bewildered, the Borderline Certifiable and the Criminally Insane. This is probably more a failing of the Myers-Briggs personality typology and the Holland Vocational typology of work environments and individuals ...

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I swear that this is true. When sitting at the Circulation Desk in the library, a woman really and truly asked me for directions to the library. I was not on drugs, intoxicated in any way, or asleep and dreaming.

Just for the record, I was actually doing some work (updating reader education pamphlets, if you're the sort of sticky beak that needs to have every inane detail, regardless of how relevant it might be).

But the fact that I was engaged in something work-related when at work, and during work hours, must be kept absolutely secret - otherwise it will blow away the whole image thing that I've worked on for years. So don't tell anyone, OK?

Librarians should not try to compete with search engines, because they're going to lose. Librarians are just not able to deliver 22 million pieces of crap in 0.03 seconds.

David Lankes, at TAFE 20:20 Vision Conference.

More quotes >>>

This joke has been doing the rounds for a while, but here's the video that started it all. Requires a video player, sound card with the volume turned on, and a bit of patience if you've got low bandwidth. But it's worth the wait ...

Dear Angela,

I love your newsletter and think you are quite inspirational in putting it all together . Do you have any way of knowing how many people read it? I thought you would be a good person to ask about this and hope you dont mind.

The above was not fabricated. It goes on for another 300 words in a similar vein. Trust me on this, you don't want to know. I should have stopped reading after "Angela". I guess the reference to "newsletter" means the writer didn't access any of the other 200 plus pages of the website ...