Biblia, Warrior Librarian: the zine for librarians that defy classification
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ADMINISTRIVIA

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Note: The opinions expressed herein are solely those of the author. Any resemblance to real librarians (living or dead, or somewhere in between) or real libraries, may be a coincidence - but probably not.

Biblia, the Warrior Librarian, was created by A.B.Credaro. The practice of Warrior Librarianship is common, and therefore quite possibly in the public domain. As such, it is likely to be exempt from any copyright restrictions. However, this does not limit Warrior Librarian Weekly, its agents, employees, heirs, spouses, family pets, or others connected with the zine, from trying to make an easy buck from its use.

Universal permission is granted to any website to create a link to any page on this site. Notification of such links is appreciated, but not mandatory.

All material on this site was written by A.B. Credaro unless otherwize stated. Requests for permission to publish or circulate any content should be directed to same.

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JEST FOR PERSPECTIVE

Archived Early February 2004 Edition

New health warning

Web Elbow With the continuing incursion of technology into libraries, health authorities have issued yet another caution regarding Internet use.

Tentatively dubbed 'Web Elbow' in an attempt to lure the yuppie market away from the long-popular 'Tennis Elbow', the new 21st Century health hazard is expected to quickly build up a dedicated band of aficionados.

Insurance agents note a decline in the incidence of 'Housemaid's Knee', which has fallen well out of vogue, due in a large part to the lack of political correctedness, and gender stereotyping.

Libraries are advised to post warnings at computer workstations, or alternatively limit the amount of time patrons may use these facilities ...

...No more to read here >>


Cashing in on knowledge

Who wants to be a millionaire? Knowledge is power. Apparently, those who know most get paid most. In the Australian version of 'Who wants to be a millionaire', a reference librarian was one of only four contestants to get to the $500,000 prize in the last series. Admitedly, these were Australian dollars, but as the contestant was a New Zealander, he reaped the additional benefits of international currency exchange rates.

So, did he get an immediate pay rise on returning to work, having proven the superior knowledge inherently required of librarians? In the vernacular, "yeah, sure ... like, not". Although with half a million in his bank account, would he care ...

... No more to read here >>


Where are they now?

Rodman Library Staff Rodman (Oh) Library staff F. Allison, S. Anderson. and K. Hotchkis are pictured here in 1960, in the days before library budgets were sufficiently large for librarians to have actual names. But what has become of them in the last 40 odd years?

According to the White Pages online, F. Allison may have moved to Salem, MA and become a construction engineer. Or possibly to Phoenix, AZ and become an attorney. Alternatively, gone to New Haven, IN and developed a career in Life Insurance. An S. Anderson is found in Cincinnati, OH practicing medicine, and another in Sheffield Village, OH running an automotive service center. Although in Dayton, OH, one S. Anderson runs a beauty salon.

And what of K. Hotchkis, always stuck up at the back of the stacks during the Rodman years? Only three in the directory, all the same person at different addresses in Cincinnati, OH practicing medicine. Curiouser and curiouser ...

... No more to read here >>


Conference threat

Biblia at conference The Warrior Librarian has threatened to appear at yet another conference. In addition to agreeing to speak at the School Library Association of Queensland's June conference, she has now also accepted an invitation by the Australian School Library Association's New South Wales branch in October.

Although it is expected that at least a few of the conference attendees will be Biblia fans, early reports indicate that the Warrior Librarian Nebraska Fan Club will not be driving to either the Gold Coast (Queensland) or Parramatta (NSW) this time ...

... ... No more to read here >>

NOT A BOOK REVIEW

Library of Alexandria After being opened for nearly 18 months, the new Library of Alexandria still hasn't burnt down. Which is pretty lucky, since it took nearly 1,500 years to get around to rebuilding this library. In line with the usual methods of raising library funds, librarians have been running bake sales and lemonade stands for many centuries. The government, realising the importance of also contributing, has been selling antiquities for nearly as long.

Of the 16,000 plus Google hits for a "new library alexandria" search, National Geographic's website seems to have the best digital coverage, being the second hit on the list (an indicator of quality that many seem to miss), and also having this neat polar bear java applet thing that appears on the page after a few seconds - advertising National Geographic. Pop-up advertising people should really re-think the dichotomy between cute, and irritating to the point of homicide.

However, if you want to avoid the inevitable wait for pages to load, the mandatory advertising, and unavoidable eyestrain, you might like to consider buying a book on this topic. New York publishers Clarion have just released Kelly Trimble's well-researched book on the Library of Alexandria (ISBN 0-395-75832-7), under the sensible title "The Library of Alexandria". Although aimed at middle school years, there is a plethora of incidental information for the older reader.

Who knew where the name 'duodenum' came from? War Hammer types can learn what a 'codex' actually is (without parting with considerable sums of money). Schools could base whole science fairs around this book. Communities could use the information to build 1:1 scale models of a pyramid ...

... No more to read here >>

WLW RESEARCH COLUMN

Searching for information For the past few weeks, the Warrior Librarian has been researching global literacy trends. Which isn't easy with a budget of zero dollars, prohibiting fact-finding missions to targeted centers of concern like Disney Land or Hawaii.

Relying entirely on published research and authoritative web sites (which, should be noted, may not necessarily be in the first page of search tool hits), things are not looking good.

Results will be published in Editorial Eye, probably around April or May ...

... ... No more to read here >>

WLW ORIGINAL LIBRARY HUMOR

MORE ORIGINAL HUMOR
Laugh yourself comatose

 man laughing
WLW Reader

Research has shown that the average librarian will take 15 to 20 minutes to read this web page. Anecdotal evidence is suggesting that many librarians fear they do not have enough time to investigate the humor links. The majority of the 90+ original library humor items (all written by Biblia, and not available anywhere else on the 'net) in the Humor Index are designed to take less than 2 minutes to read.

However, if you choose to hang around there for hours reading them all, then re-reading them, then WLW cannot take any responsibility. You now have the choice of using the genetically unmodified Alphabetical Index or the dolphin-safe Dewey Version. Caffeine-free version has been temporarily canned, pending an FDA investigation ...

MOST POPULAR BIBLIA PAGES TO DATE:
Caution: Will open in new window ...


SHAMELESS SELF PROMOTION

MASS MEDIA: Yet again, there has been no coverage in any of the national papers on either Biblia or Warrior Librarian Weekly. Sheesh, even the Blacktown Sun and the Blacktown Advocate seem to be completely tied up with other stories ...

CONFERENCES Biblia's next conference appearance is scheduled on June 29, 2004 for the School Library Association of Queensland. Members and friends of MEMO can click here for the report on the Fargo conference.

ACADEMIA: The University of Texas at Arlington now lists this website on its page 'Websites for Professional Growth'...

INTERNET: Google now lists 'about' 1,830 hits for a search on the phrase "warrior librarian". Not that we check regularly or anything ....


FROM THE MAILBOX: Nothing worse than an empty mailbox - except maybe one crammed with junk. Currently running at between 400 and 600 items marked with variations of 'undeliverable', of greatest concern in the current spam worm plague are those items now appearing with the header "No mail will be accepted from this domain as you have been identified as a spammer". Be assured that Warrior Librarian Weekly and the Warrior Librarian do not offer to enlarge or reduce any body parts ...

... ... No more to read here >>

Electioneering is dominating the Australian press, one can't help but note the continual mention of libraries, accompanied by the results of staged 'photo opportunities' in school libraries as politicians utilize the public's concerns regarding education.

It is not known whether this development is in any way related to the Australian Parliamentary Library purchasing a copy of Biblia's Guide. However, it sure is a much more successful campaign strategy than capitalizing on concerns regarding public health care. No candidate would want to be photographed with sick or injured people ...

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EDITORIAL
SOAPBOX
Biblia, the Warrior Librarian
Graphic by Peter Lewis

YOU HAVE TO LAUGH

Now that Valentine's Day nearly here, this is a great time to set up a major display and get romance fiction circulating. Some media reports suggest giving candy away with loans, but socially responsible libraries should consider free carrot sticks or tooth-brushes ...

Amar Ekushey Book Fair introduced about 900 new books to readers in Bangladesh. Interestingly, the fair is held in honor of "Language Movement martyrs". Is this a new euphemism for librarians?

Children's and school librarians will be interested to know that three new movies, based on novels are slated for production. Very useful film "tie-ins" for Bridge to Terabithia as well as Australian author Wendy Orr's Nim's Island, plus the award-winning The Giver.

Once again, the political might of Warrior Librarian Weekly has produced legislative changes in the US. Following our last edition of WLW - where we highlighted the plight of college students being unable to afford text books - Rep. Barbara Massey Reece, D-Menlo has introduced a bill to address this issue ...

More FREE BOOKS. Whilst Scott Snyder, a Turlock (CA) real estate agent and former minister gave away four books, Mexico is addressing its literacy problems by giving away 1.5 million books to rail commuters ...

An alert reader in Malaysia has noticed that libraries don't have sufficient funding to purchase as many new books as patrons expect ...

Nice of the press to include an item about how the appearance of a library doesn't accurately reflect the quality of the collection ...

Shooters representing every club in the county took part in the Norfolk Archery Association indoor championships at North Walsham Sports Centre are reported to have "re-written the record books". Let's hope they gave due attention to the original authors, and all citations were properly articulated ...

Now being called The Oprah Effect, the mention of a particular book title on any TV program almost guarantees an increase in sales. The 2.7 million viewers of the (UK) Channel 4's "Richard and Judy" show are being held responsible for an additional 35,000 copies of the book being sold. WLW notes that this represents a rate of 0.012% viewer purchases.

A new study has revealed that second-hand books are cheaper than new ones. Reported in The Torch, the official student newspaper of St John's University, this news will be very useful to students ...

According to Calvin Reed, a writer who covers the African-American market for Publishers Weekly magazine, the latest hot trend in urban fiction is street lit, also known as hip-hop books. With their graphic depiction of pimps, drugs and hustlers, librarians who haven't had a really invigorating challenge for a while might like to consider building a special collection ...

There is no more >>


QUOTE OF THE WEEK

A truly great library contains something in it to offend everyone.

Jo Godwin

DIVERSION OF THE WEEK

Having a Bad Day? You can now relieve your tension in a politically incorrect way with these penguins. No instructions are provided by the web site, but it's simple enough to work it out ...

There is no more >>

LIBRARY WEB SITE OF THE WEEK

The Manifesto Of Avant-Garde Librarianship is unlikely to appear in the appendices of many library policy documents, along with the UN statement on Freedom to Read ...

There is no more >>

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February 8, 2004